The Great Oracle of "O" , the matron saint of Left-Wing Media Omniscience and Omnipotence, The Omnific Oprah herself, has spoken.
She wants to tell us how to defacate in weird shapes.
I swear on a stack of Mother Jones back issues I am not making this up. On her show, Oprah discussed (with a guest) the art of making multi shaped poop. I read about it on my favorite blog site, DebbieSchlussel dotcom. See for yourself: